Air Raid Sirens

The first week I was in France I was sitting in the bedroom with the blue carpet (as opposed to the living room with the brown carpet or the hallway with the blue tile carpet) when I heard an air raid siren. A genuine the Germans are on their way, find shelter and wait for General De Gaulle to tell you what to do air raid siren. Needless to say I was a bit panicked and had no idea what the proper protocol was. I wasn't sure if duck and cover was applicable to air raids. Was France under attack? Did this suggest impeding war? Was I supposed to exit the building and go somewhere? I didn't know, so I did nothing and waiting, anxiously looking out the window to see what the sage French people were doing so that I could follow them to safely. I still had barely an idea of where I lived and didn't want to get lost again. (Earlier that week I had gotten lost on a run and had to ask some gardeners where I lived. Don't think that doesn't make you look like a stupid American, excusez-moi de vous déranger, mais savez vous où j'habite?) Then the siren stopped and no one seemed the least bit concerned so I went back to my busy day of trying to figure out what the fuck I was doing in France. Of course, at that time I didn't know not one person in the whole city to ask why the hell there was an air raid siren, so it took several months before I had the answer. "Mais Béthanie...(in French my name changed- it always started with but, Bethany, followed by the condescending you are incredibly dumb for asking such a silly question how could it possibly be any other way tone. Exceptions to that tone were of course the chemists, who never used condescending tones with me. ) Anyways, the explanation was that mais Béthanie, of course they sound the air raid siren every week at noon on Wednesday just to make sure it works. Mais bien sûr. Why would you do anything else?

I bring this all up because last night I dreamed that I heard an air raid siren and I was going to have to run for shelter when I finally aroused myself out of my deep sleep to discover that Clark was just howling right next to my ear. Also I had a baby in my dream. I'm not sure he was mine, but I was in charge of an infant.