Detecting

Yesterday Sara and Jessica came over for dinner and what turned out to be too much gin on my part. At one moment our conversation was about my detecting skills and how, since they just have one cat each, it's pretty easy to find out who committed any crimes at their houses by first ruling themselves out: "Who shit on the floor? Wasn't me, must have been the cat." Whereas I have to do real detecting.

This morning when I got up I found that someone one had thrown up in the corner in the sewing room and I could not immediately rule myself out as a suspect. I didn't think it was me and I sure as heck didn't want to believe that I had been so drunk that I threw up in the corner in the sewing room and didn't remember. It threw me for a loop. The sewing room would have been an unusual place for me. I started thinking, good God, what else don't I remember? And planning a day checking the sent mailbox to see what drunken rants I may have sent while I was in here. Luckily, it wasn't me. Subsequent lab results revealed that the contents were the chewed up bone from the pork roast, which had been in the trash. And I know, no matter how drunk I was, I did not go digging through the trash can to eat a pork bone. Not when there were still brownies left anyways. I'm pretty sure I've not seen the end of this pork bone. I'm sure I'm going to be dealing with its consequences for a few days.

I am no closer to knowing who actual culprit is, though the prime suspects are, of course, Randi and Earl, since they are always trying to get in the trash.