Two, Deux, Dos

Last week Max turned two!  Yea Max!!  To say Max's birthday was a fucking disaster would not be exaggerating.  It was a damn miserable day.  My parents did their best and purchased everything online and at Toys R Us that was within two years of being age appropriate including but limited to:  a 4x4 truck, a basketball hoop, a bike (that they gave him a month ago because they couldn't stand it) and everything Thomas the Train available.  I didn't even want to get the Little Guy anything.  I said "Dad, it's too much."  He said, "It can never be too much."  While opening presents most of the adults in the room tried to pretend that we were having a good time, but that degenerated into hysterical screaming when my mom put the Thomas the Train cake on the table and Max couldn't have the "choo-choos."  Hysterical screaming became full-blown hysterical crying when the birthday boy accidentally stuck his fingers in his cake and scared himself during the birthday song.  After that the whole evening just degenerated into screaming.  Happy fucking Birthday.

Beep- Beep

Doing as good as the Lakers

Distraught over the cake

Happy about his Thomas the Train backpack.

With Aunt Beth who is now blond.

The second part of the birthday week was going to the train museum at Griffith park.  My dad thought it was funny, funny, funny that he was taking me to the train museum, since I have been vocal about how boring I think trains are.  At the train museum, I looked around and said, "Yup, trains are boring." While looking around I noticed that all of the visitors to the train museum happened to have a Y chromosome. One dad walked his daughter up to the model train display where the toddlers were overcome with joy at watching the model trains and said to her, "Do you want to look at the trains?"  And she yelled, "NO!" And walked away.  I thought, you go girl!  Max had a great time and learned to say "All aboard!" but I stand by my original assertion that trains are fucking boring.

All Aboard

A dog a guy tied up.  Not gonna lie, I kinda like this picture.

Choo-choo