Infectious Tracheobronchitis

Impound Fees -$160
License Fees -$48
Eau de Pound Cologne -Free
Infectious Tracheobronchitis-Priceless

Randi and Earl got a lot from being in the pound. Most notably, they now have kennel cough. This is when dogs sound like they are going to hack up a lung and may or may not vomit. Lovely. Symptoms include, coughing, difficulty breathing, and depression? Depression? How in the world am I supposed to figure out if Randi and Earl are depressed. Symptoms of depression: Lack of energy-not so much. Decrease in desire to do pleasurable activities-they're still being bad. Sleeping too much, too little, eating too much, too little. Suicide? They did try to kill each other a couple of years ago, but now? Do they need to go on some Cymbalta? Substance Abuse. What if Earl's pot smoking is just masking his depression and making it worse? This is just complicated.

What are you supposed to do for a dog with kennel cough? Well watch them, in case their symptons get worse. What if Randi and Earl start dressing goth and reading vampire books. Also, I'm supposed to not let them exercise and I should have enforced periods of inactivity. I'll need some help with that one. Am I supposed to freaking chain them down? I tried that and they tried to kill each other!

Randi's violent sneezing could be related to the fact that she could have something stuck in her nose, like a foxtail. A foxtail. Right. I bet they'd find a bobbin case, or an eraser or a bug or some equally dumb thing that she snorted up for fun. Or it could be allergies. In which case I could give her benedryl which would knock her out and help with the forced inactivity.

Luckily kennel cough is not contagious for humans, and the Eau de Pound cologne washed out fairly easily. Freaking Randi and Earl.